First Poem

Well, ok, technically this is probably not the very first poem I ever wrote in my life.  I am sure when we wrote poetry and prose in English during school I must have had to create some poems as well as different stories, but truthfully if you asked me what they were, I don’t have a clue.

This one, though, I wrote in a little notebook that on the front was completely covered with flowers and the back was completely a dark green colour with some writing (which I’m guessing was the publication info etc).  I can’t quite remember who gave it to me - that’s gone through the mists of time.  There’s probably only a handful of people who would or could have done.

I remember I had come back from a funeral for a girl who (I think) wasn’t even 2 years old.  There was no coffin, just a beautiful picture of her sitting on the floor at probably around 11-13 months - before she got the cancer that took her life.  I was only 16 years old with absolutely no intention of writing a poem but I needed to express what I was feeling about the whole thing.

All these years later I can honestly say I can’t remember the complete poem and have literally no idea where that little book went, but I CAN give you the very first verse which I remembered by heart when speaking to my therapist either last week or the one before.  I decided that because it was all I could remember, I would write the first verse down to start with and then create a new poem in keeping with the sentiments expressed.

I’d like to share this with you now.  So here it is, in all its unvarnished glory, a combination of past and present writing.  I trust you enjoy it and would love to hear what you think of it.

Can I accept with joy roses and thorns?

Can I accept crosses and crowns?

Can I accept all things as from God?

Can I accept the good and the bad?

Do we really want the roses and crowns?

Because they never come to us alone 

Their beauty and their splendour 

Are enriched by the sacrifices made.

Life doesn’t demand a needless sacrifice 

There is always a reason behind it

The bad things always will still come 

We cannot make steps to avoid them.

We think that life is just too much 

That the pain we feel won’t vanish away 

But it’s the things that we don’t see

The flashes of roses amidst the thorns.

When we focus on the hard things in life

It blinds us to the things that are good.

And yet if we can look beyond them

We’ll see the sparks of beauty and joy.

Because in every difficult situation 

Something always comes that’s good

But if we’ve shut our hearts and minds

We never will perceive the truth.

Good and bad always exist together 

They are each one side of the coin

Giving us what we need to live fully

Not hidden away out of sight.

Accepting both with  joy isn’t easy

But that doesn’t change the truth

Our lives must be a mix of the two 

And change us as we grow together.

Life always has a measure of pain

Joy and happiness are its counterpart 

We must accept the good and the bad

Exploring what each one teaches us.

We can’t change what happens to us

But we can decide how to respond to it

Find the light that shines in the darkness 

And know that is what it’s meant to be.