Pick of the week 14

Have you ever thought that something you did or thought about doing or something you managed to live through wasn’t worth anything?  That you either were not good enough or maybe even the situation you went through was your fault because of x,y,z?

Now I know just how easy it is to doubt yourself when something “goes wrong” and if you have a poor self-image, it can really make you very down.  I know.  It’s happened to me many times.  In fact, I think I told you that it was only now, in my 50th year of life, that I FINALLY felt proud of something I had done.

Often people with low self-esteem are seen to be people pleasers.  Well, yes, I guess you “could” call them that.  It’s NOT necessarily that they want to live their lives as people pleasers.  For myself, I never felt that i was capable of making “adult” decisions (whatever that means) and that ANYBODY (whether younger or older than myself) was better at telling me what to do or what I SHOULD do.

But can I tell you something?  Allowing people to make choices for you is NOT the best way to overcome self image issues.  Having said that, learning HOW to make your own decisions isn’t easy either!  The fact is, to MAKE decisions you HAVE to believe you know what you are doing and trust yourself.

I must say, I do still struggle at times to only ask for opinions, not to go with it and not make a choice myself.  But often it can go against what I ACTUALLY want to do.  And it doesn’t matter if someone else thinks it is right or not.  I have to know it is right for me at the time.

TREASURE

Trusting myself only happened in my 50th year for the very first time.  Yes, it’s taking me a while to learn HOW to make decisions that align with myself, but I know when i have made enough decisions and to say that’s enough for me today.  Now I am learning to be happy with that.  Do you find decisions easy to make?