Thoughts of the week 21

One of the hardest things I have thought about/looked at is taking care of myself.  Basically in any way I can conceive of.  I didn’t want anyone looking or thinking that I was selfish or uncaring or deaf to those that needed help MORE than I did = ie I was putting myself LAST in everything and so wasted the little energy I did have.

Worrying about the idea/s or concepts or thoughts or how other people viewed me isn’t the best way to live.  People pleasing can only get you so far.  And then you don’t have the energy, imagination or capacity or motivation to do something for yourself.  I am only really (I think) beginning to understand the necessity of self care and WHY it is so important.

Being a people pleaser isn’t something that brings me joy and peace but the opposite.  In the end I need to take care of myself and ONLY do things that I KNOW I can do….or have delightful things like seizures and multiple falls and migraines.  No, I’m not saying that is what is going to happen to you, but living as our authentic selves really does help as does not worrying about what others believe you to be.  Their ideas DO NOT define me.

Personally, I don’t think I am at the stage where I have worked this through yet.  I am getting there though.  Last year, I found myself being proud of myself for something  and I found myself proud of what I had done.  I wasn’t waiting for anyone to praise me, to know I had done a great job myself.

TREASURE 

I CAN know that something is good and rely on my own ability to see that for myself.  But if you want to say something to encourage anyone, please don’t wait until they are dead.