Forgiveness and mental health

I suppose that actually guilt and forgiveness are related to each other.  Guilt can eat away at mental health because it destroys peace of mind.  Children are taught to apologise for wrongdoing and to accept if somebody else says sorry to them.

However, one of the things I noticed some years back is that people often believe that when forgiveness comes, forgetting also is part of that process.  But I don’t believe forgetting is necessarily part of the process.  And what happens if somebody doesn’t apologise for what they did?  

Not everybody wants to be forgiven and will sometimes blame the person they hurt for what they themselves did.  That doesn’t make it right but I have realised that if I want to keep my mental health more stable, even if forgiveness isn’t requested, it’s wise to give it anyway.

Even when you extend forgiveness to the individual that hurt/damaged you when they haven’t requested it, is it necessary to tell them?  Personally, I believe not.  Because I don’t forgive for THEIR sake, but my own.  And if they ever came to me and apologised I would tell them at that point I forgave them already.  

Forgiveness is more for peace of mind and keeping mentally stable so that drowning in guilt doesn’t happen.  Learning to live and accept what has happened is more important than holding on to the pain and opinions of others.  

TREASURE

Forgiving is part of how I care for my mental health.  The process is necessary for me to live in peace and putting myself in a better place.